There's been a small flurry of panegyrics for The Sopranos; I can't comment on whether or not the finalé was a let-down or not since I never saw a single episode of HBO's operatic goodfellafest. It's one of several near-universally lauded tv series (24, Alias, Boys From the Black Stuff, Deadwood, Heimat, Roots, The Royle Family, Six Feet Under, Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy/Smiley's People, The West Wing) that I've never seen despite many an opportunity.

I was into Lost- big time- before the ongoing media war between Rupert Murdoch and Richard Branson deprived me of it. And I mightily enjoyed the first episode of Studio 60 On The Sunset Strip. If anything, the fact it's been cancelled already makes it more appealling to me, as I know I needn't invest in it. I'm also digging Dexter; it's fun to think that he might at any moment bump into that other carrot-headed Miamian incarnation of justice, Horatio Caine.

This reminds me of a game Stephen Fry mentions in his books, and which uniquefergus recently indulged in; confessing to shocking, inexcusable gaps in your cultural experience. So, tv aside:

Authors whom I've never read a word of : any of the Brontës; Victor Hugo; Stephen King; Herman Mellville; Hugh McDiarmid; George Orwell; Ian Rankin; Sir Walter Scott; Will Self; Viginia Woolf.

Films I've never seen in full : Annie Hall; any cut of Blade Runner; Casablanca; Do the Right Thing; any of the Godfather trilogy; Gone With the Wind; any of the Three Colours trilogy; anything by Bergman, Kurosawa or Powell & Pressburger.

Music I've never listened to (rather than simply heard): Antony and the Johnsons; Woody Guthrie; Janis Joplin; Joy Division; Bob Marley; Pink Floyd; The Sex Pistols; The Small Faces; The Smiths; Rufus Wainwright.

In this last category I'm particularly guilty of transgression. In the past mcgazz and today mirpuri despair of my tin ear and apparent inability to be moved by music. I guess I'm just irrevocably, irredeemably visual. What music I do like invariably has a visual association to it; classical compositions, film scores or highly narrative song-writers (Jarvis Cocker, Neil Hanon) that encourage you to picture something as you listen.

That and my flinty, cold heart. Oh yes. Life's hardened me.
NB- Your correspondent, then aged 22, cried at the end of The Iron Giant.

As Y referred to in her journal, we took in the recently-closed exhibition of Pixar work at the National Museum of Scotland several weeks ago. I hadn't realised at the time that this was the vanguard of the inaugural Six Cities Design Festival, going on right now in Glasgow, Edinburgh, Stirling, Dundee, Aberdeen and Inverness.

Over the Bank Holiday weekend we saw some other events tied in with this festival, as well as a couple of unrelated but none-the-less rewarding exhibitions in nearby venues. This reflected the experience we'd had on Good Friday. Just to recap, the Pixar show was, it hardly needs saying, a fantastic range of "behind-the-scenes" artwork and I walked out with my head buzzing with all I'd tried to absorb from the various storyboards, character designs, maquettes and background paintings. Most mind-blowing was the unique Toy Story 3-D zoëtrope, inspired by the My Neighbour Totoro piece at the Studio Ghibli museum in Mitaka, Japan. I won't even attempt to describe it, other than to say it's the closest I've ever seen to living, breathing cartoon characters. Anyway, this feast of rich visuals was followed by an unexpected sorbet when we stumbled on the National Library's exhibition of Dick Bruna's children's book illustrations, celebrating 50 years of his rabbit character Miffy. Y describes the insane process he uses to create his rigorously minimalist artwork.

Anyway, to return to recent days, and Six Cities. We went to Dundee on Saturday principally for the Biff!Bam!!Crikey!!! comics conference and exhibition. This was a weird event; the title (clichéd though it is) and Dennis the Menace- heavy publicity material (including a spot on children's tv show Newsround) suggested a family event. Yet it was organised by the English department of the University of Dundee and so had an extremely scholarly air, that of a symposium for academics more than a casual gathering of fans. A typical presentation was this one: "Language and Fiction in the Creation of Reality in Grant Morrison's The Invisibles". This focus on the textual, contextual and metatextual matter of comics was even more bizarre when you remembered we were meant to be at a design festival. None of the speakers (on the Saturday anyway) were concerned at all with the artwork side of comics. There was a lot of worthwhile stuff going on, but it felt shoe-horned into the wider programme of events. Y and I saw at least one disappointed child and disgruntled parent leave, and had to be honest in our feedback when asked by a survey taker "What has this event taught you about design?" "Nothing." Shame, since Six Cities featured other animation and comics-related material and, should it continue in future years, might be the closest we ever get to a decent cartoon festival in Scotland. I certainly hope lessons are learned and the comics element retained.

Saw some familiar faces from the old days of SCCAM and early days of SCAS: comics historians Paul Gravett and Roger Sabin (who spoke at the Auld Alliance conference as part of the Fizzers launch last year); John Chalmers and Sandra Marrs of Metaphrog, still hard at work on their sweet/sinister Louis books; Bill Ritchie, creator of Baby Crocket; DC Thomson staff illustrator Dave Gudgeon and Beano editor Alan Digby. We took in the Timorous Beasties show at DCA- Peacocks Among the Ruins- and then rounded the day off with a reading by Alan Bisett from his novel, The Incredible Adam Spark. This was a treat. Bisett's a very good actor and- as one audience member pointed out- it's a shame his novel doesn't come with a cd or dvd of him delivering his prose. I'll say no more as I suspect Y will want to write something about one specific aspect of the evening.

On Monday we went to the centre piece of the Six Cities programme, The Scottish Show at The Lighthouse in Glasgow. This is a huge exhibition of very diverse work by a whole host of designers. The contributions range from the very practical (the seating and signage dotted around the venue has all been especially designed for the festival) to the completely whimsical (Donna Wilson's display of knitted creatures). I think my favourites were ISO Design's digital films on obscure laws, like the old saw about it being legal to shoot a Scotsman with a longbow within the city walls of York, except on a Sunday. Shame one of their five screens wasn't working. That's why I'll never be persuaded away from paper, pens and paint: they don't crash, corrupt or disappear in a power cut. Nor are half the world's eyes Mac and the other half pc; there's no cross-platform issues when asking someone to look at a painting. Anyway, the festival ends June 3rd but The Scottish Show is on until August 12th so catch it if you can. I recommend it.

In the nearby Gallery of Modern Art was an unconnected but very worthwhile installation by Roderick Buchanan entitled Histrionics, tackling the issue of sectarianism in Glasgow and in particular pipe bands and marches. A fifty-minute loop of recorded rehearsals by two bands, the Black Skull Corps of Fife and Drum Band and the Parkhead Republican Flute Band, play inside a specially constructed triangular space within the main gallery. The outer walls of this are decorated with various freizes, exploring such topics as the recent glut of international (and therefore inter-faith) players signed to Celtic and Rangers and the truly mixed backgrounds of the artist and his wife. From the exterior, the music from either band sounds seamlessly woven and virtually indistinguishable (at least to those not well-versed in the specifics of Loyalist and Republican anthems). Once inside, we see the two bands' films are simultaneously projected on screens separated by a solid wall, and once the details of their uniforms, flags and livery are revealed, as well as their respective statements of purpose written at either doorway, the music that moments earlier seemed a medley of innocuous, even jolly, marching band music is recast as a tit-for-tat fight with flutes in place of fists.

What was more striking was the written responses left by visitors. Aside from the usual foaming "this isn't art!" drivel (some of which I swear was in the same hand as the most outraged of the Fizzers feedback... Let's leave artists to decide what art is, shall we children?) the amount of venom and prejudice leveled at Buchanan by some was appalling. I truly cannot imagine any artist going to greater lengths to ensure that both sides of the argument have been faithfully, equally, and non-judgementally represented. But that's never enough for those who come with generations of baggage, who want so badly to unearth an anti-Unionist, British, Protestant/Republican, Irish, Catholic conspiracy where none exists. I even saw gallery attendants frowning, fuming, leaving or smiling, bouncing, whistling depending on whose music was playing at any given moment- unacceptable behaviour from staff whose job it is to present and safeguard art, not pass comment on it. All this proved to me that Glasgow, still- despite McConnell and Nil by Mouth and all the rest- isn't ready to fully admit its sectarianism problem, much less solve it.

Anyway, that downer was in stark contrast to the absolute highlight of the weekend, a showing of both limited edition giclées and original paintings and drawings by Sebastian Krüger in Edinburgh. Again, this was unconnected with Six Cities. But it was also bizarrely under-publicised (only two press write-ups?) and unforgivably, unaccountably, incomprehensibly short (only four days?!) for an artist who is without a shadow of a doubt the best caricaturist on the planet. Krüger's long-standing obsession with the Rolling Stones (his excuse; they're too damn easy to do) was evident in the thirty or so pieces on display as well as his broader loves, music and movies. Of the big splashy canvases (some of them going for forty-five large!) I was most taken with his portrayal of Hitch. But my absolute favourite was a pencil drawing of Peter Lorre, a snip at £500. Huh? Huh? Anyone?




It was invaluable seeing some of these paintings, familiar to me from print, "in the flesh" as it was a chance to get more of an appreciation for the man's technique. Some of the paintings were truly enormous, meaning that while taken in as a whole they might look very polished, close examination revealed a much looser, almost laissez-faire approach. There was evidence of whole sections started and later abandoned, painted over, and much exploitation of what I like to call "happy accidents". What that means of course is that Krüger might be exceptionally skilled but his real edge lies in his confidence. That comes only with practice but the problem is- after seeing his stuff- it's hard not to be as much intimidated as inspired... Though we had an Edinburgh show, ooh, eight times bigger and twenty times longer, so get it up ye, Sebass!

With polling day in the Scottish Elections a fortnight off, let's look at what the various parties have to say about the arts, shall we? Oh, go on, it'll be fun...

Scottish Conservative & Unionist Party
• Merge budgets of Scottish Enterprise and Highland & Island Enterprise.
• New Scottish skills agency for better and more available workforce for Scottish Business.
• See that arts bodies are free from state interference.
• Note the relationship between culture and tourism.
Pretty weak sauce from a pretty weak party. If the Tories are ever going to get a toe-hold back in Scottish politics, they need to divorce the main Conservative party and reinvent themselves as a one that can reclaim the right-of-centre vote from neo-Nazis and bible-thumpers sneaking their way onto council backbenches.

Scottish Green Party
• Cherish culture that empowers people and strengthens communities.
• Arms-length arts funding to be preserved.
• Arts experts, not politicians, to determine arts policy.
• Encourage provision of workshop/studio spaces and increase training.
• Add cultural & social remit to Scottish Enterprise.
• Press Westminster for more broadcasting powers.
• Will ensure that grant-receiving bodies adhere to national standards for artists.
• Conduct audit of libraries.
• Support and enhance Gaelic and Scots language.
Better, but as you'd expect this isn't an area in which the Greens are making their big proposals. However, depending on how the election goes, the Greens and SSP (more on them later) could be crucial in terms of majority-forming.

Scottish Labour Party
• Will introduce a Culture Bill that will deliver Cultural Entitlements.
• Culture to become an integral part within education.
• More public art in partnership with private sector.
• Want artist in residence within regeneration of cities.
• Public art Landmark on the A74 entry to Scotland.
• Display ‘art in storage’ within community.
• Will utilise 2009 year of Homecoming to raise profile of artists.
• Art Futures fund for arts graduates to work in community.
• Will continue to make new funds available including to local authorities.
• Promoting excellence and participation.
• Will ‘incentivise’ new artistic work by new commissioning and acquisitions funds.
• Will support artist through national agencies.
• Will support Gaelic & Scots and British sign language.
I've no more to say about the Culture Bill, except I don't want to see it become law. Whether it does depends on Labour being one of the parties in power after the 3rd, and indeed Wee Jack being Labour's leader. This thing's very much his baby and I wouldn't be surprised that if he steps down (which he almost certainly will if Labout take the kicking we're all expecting) his successor won't feel beholden to it.
Last night I was speaking to a couple of English artists who moved up here a fortnight ago, and they where asking me about who to go to for funding. I had to tell them, genuinely, that I had no idea. All bets are off. If Labour are in government next month we'll be looking at an unknown quantity in the shape of the Creative Scotland superquango. If not, who knows? Would the Nats bring back the Scottish Arts Council, or come up with something else again? And in Glasgow, the (Labour) council have deferred all responsibility for cultural provision to a charitable trust, the fifteenth local authority in Scotland to do so. Yet another unknown element.

Scottish Liberal Democrats
• Artists must be free to create.
• Education should give experience of music arts & drama.
• The arts to be free from Government interference and bureaucracy.
• Ensure high-level investment for arts & from local authorities.
• Must support economic and grassroots.
• Give Creative Scotland more scope to build on success of Scottish screen/also contemporary music.
• Creative Scotland should advise the Government on its need not the other way round.
• Creative Scotland should develop cultural hubs.
• Will continue to support National companies directly.
So, both a dig at their partner's Culture Bill with the points on freedom and "interference" (echoed by the Tories, Greens, Nats, and SSP) and a commitment to the Creative Scotland agency it proposes.
No party has disappointed me more than the LibDems this year, most especially on their (apparent) refusal to budge on an independence referendum which makes coallition with the SNP virtually impossible. Maybe they'll soften come the day, but this "the election is a referendum" line doesn't wash while there's more than one party that're for an end to the Union. I'd have thought a party with the word "democrat" in their name would have been more amenable. Ho hum.

Scottish National Party
• Will support and invest in creative sector in order to stimulate artistic output.
• Will implement tax exemption for Scottish artists on sale of work up to £15,000. Prior to fiscal independence in Scotland, a grant scheme will operate to allow this to be reclaimed.
• Three new forms of arts funding: 1. Equity stake (loan with some repayment at later stage). 2. Flexible loans. 3. Grants
• Possible film tax benefits.
• New Culture Bill to ensure arts are free to reach potential.
• Utterly opposed to direct Government intervention in arts.
• Establish Edinburgh Festivals Expo fund.
• Encourage arts at international level.
• Scottish Winter festival linking St Andrew's Day, Hogmanay and Burns Night.
Oh, god... I'll have to wade through another Culture Bill?!
As usual, it's the Nats who are grabbing the lion's share of the press this year. Their tax exemption plan inevitably brought them great publicity last week, attracting as it did the endorsement of Irvine Welsh. Unfortunately it's been badly reported in some quarters, and hasn't been particularly well-explained on the hustings, to the extent that some artists think they'll be entitled to £15k's worth of income under the SNP, which ain't exactly the same thing.
Even if the party do as well as the polls say they will (and the Nats always loose the switherers, come the day), they won't have a majority and will have to form a coallition that seems likely to include the Greens, socialist parties and independents too (Margo MacDonald sat on the same side of the house as Alex Salmond? Who'd have thunk?).
There's also the quandry facing those who've been attracted by the SNP's apparently pro-artist stance but who really, really rather wouldn't see the UK spilt. English-born, or wedded to English partners... Maybe just working in England on a regular basis. I think the SNP consistently underestimate the number of people who live here and truly feel British. Not in a repellent, flag wearing, "No Surrender" way, just a quiet sense of identity with the shared heritage of these islands.

Scottish Socialist Party
• Free access to galleries etc.
• Revitalise Gaelic & Scots language.
• Encourage ethnic culture.
• Broadcasting responsibility to Scottish parliament.
• National film studio.
• National project to transform drab towns.
• Replace SAC with a more open, democratic and representative body.
• Invest in Community Arts.
• Double arts budget.
I'd like to see the SSP make some headway this year but I feel their vote will be split by the cult of personality around Tommy Sheridan as he, his mother and sister and for all I know dog and postie too all stand as Solidarity candidates. It's been depressing to see the only left wing party with seats in Scottish government conform to the "Peoples Front of Judea" stereotype and fall to bits in the last year. Colin Fox has done a fairly good job of leading in the betanned one's stead, but I'm afraid that amid financial worries and a lingering perception of treachery the shine's gone off them.

At least I'll be able to actually vote for someone I want this year. My Westminster MP is Michael Martin, the Speaker of the House, and it's apparently "good form" (but not very democratic) for the main parties to field no opposition in his constituency. So come the day in 2005 I was confronted with a paper made up of one incumbent Labour MP and a raft of fringe lunatics.